Dos Equis’ “Most Interesting Man” was an accomplished performer. When his star was on the rise his dossier included amazing feats, like parallel-parking a Concorde SST, teaching Ghandi how to cook rice pilaf, and arm-wrestling a flea with a pair of tweezers.
Outstanding stuff, but what’s most interesting about the ad was not him so much, but why all the hotties dripping around him like burst tubes of K-Y Jelly had no voice in the commercial narrative.
Hold on, let me guess! After 50+ years struggling for equality women finally cracked the glass ceiling, to bag prized roles as concubine mutes fawning over a decommissioned soldier-of-fortune afflicted with an ambivalent partiality for tepid lager and curvilinear babes on the prowl for easy wallet. That it?
But wait, isn’t this 2015, the age of enlightenment, where interesting men seek out like-minded women to match wit and intellect? Or did we relapse into a neo-dark age, where males are hard-wired to hog the spotlight, and females are herded into galleries to swoon admiringly at troglodytes with no detectable endowments except bulging packages set on auto-pulsate.
Or maybe I read too much in the commercial. Maybe Dos Equis only wanted to sell beer, while promoting the message that an interesting man should never be upstaged by a woman, moreso if her last name is suffixed with “PhD”. Because in Dos Equis’ view, women are merely subservient ornaments, and based on their deafening silence they're happy carrying the message. Anyway, girls gotta pay bills, too, right?
Long time ago, Virginia Slims marketed a cigarette to women with the pitch “You’ve come a long way, baby.” Dos Equis begs to differ – you’re back to the starting block.
Okay, now I get it. Now I’ll shut up.